The Bicycle Boy.

Today, as I drove comfortably in my car, I watched a little boy paddle his bicycle up a slight hill. He looked like he was barely 9 years old, dressed in shabby clothing and mismatched slippers. Mind you, I was driving rather slowly, captivated by this random everyday happening.

All of a sudden, he must have bumped on something for the next thing I knew, he fell of his bike face first on the ground. At that very moment, I felt like stopping the car and getting out to give some assistance to this little boy. But instead I stayed in the comfort of my car, watching him get back up and continued paddling.

I watched him paddle and paddle from the review mirror, and somehow this little incident moved my heart. I had a rather sheltered and comfortable childhood. Never having to go anywhere without the comfort of being driven in a car by my parents or older siblings.

I then wondered how many more children in KK had to endure the same fate as this bicycle boy. If he did it for leisure, then all I can say is he better be more careful whilst riding his bicycle by a busy roadside. But if he did it only because he couldn't have the same comforts as I did as a child, then my heart goes out to him and those like him.

And then I found myself walking back to my car after meeting up with friends. Two little boys were talking in front of me about which kind of security men did they like the most, the ones who wear blue or those who wore white. They talked about how they aspired to be like them one day when they're older. Cutest. Conversation. Ever.

I then said a silent prayer, hoping that my prayers would be answered seeing that is it Lent, and asked God if he could somehow show enough mercy to these children who are deprived of love and attention from those who brought them into this world.

To present to them opportunities to get themselves a better life. To help them realize that their worth more than whatever the society and the naysayers say they do. To be brave enough to dream big and to want more for themselves but at the same time realizing the worth of hard work and determination.

I'm lucky to have had the guidance of my father, who never stopped believing in me and who still believes I could be more than what I am now. I'm lucky to have a mother who nags at me every time I slack or do not reach my full potential. I'm lucky to have siblings to keep me grounded and level-headed. I'm lucky to be surrounded by hard-working friends that inspire me to dream big and work harder.

But luck is defined as a force that brings good fortune, so instead I am actually blessed.

Enjoy the little things in life, for it is those exact things that shape our lives.

Good day to you, friend.

~xoxo,moumou~

Taking It As It Is.

There was always a reason on why I threaded carefully through certain things in life. This was one of them.

I've done this before and I've done it again. And now I'm left with a playlist of songs that can soothe the ache within. These days, I couldn't even stand the sound of my own thoughts. This tragedy(I'd like to think of it as one) has plagued my emotions and left me feeling hollow.

Thank you for all that I'm feeling by the way, for through this bitter experience I know I am alive.

~xoxo,moumou~

All sigh-ed out.

You know, you could say so much about someone without realizing how ugly it makes you feel. Gossip. It's fun when you do it in the comfort of your close friends or family. It's fun when you barely know the person and just feel like channeling all your frustrations onto someone. And it's especially fun when you don't like that individual.

I draw a fine line on gossiping based on factual/non-factual information and degrading someone just to feel better about your own short-comings. Yes, I am one to speak considering I make fun of people's horrible grammar but the FACT is that it is horrible and its genuinely mind-fucking.

I know I've said many things about many people and I know my words have probably reached their ears. Truly, I am sorry for being immature and less thoughtful about the outcomes of my actions.

BUT the things is, gossiping is done in the comfort of your CLOSE friends and family. The reason we do so is because we know that the collateral damage would be minimal and the chances of the said individual finding out is low.

When the trust is breached, how does one believe in you again? They don't. They'll never trust you, they'll never confide in you and they sure as hell won't include you in anything ever again. So before you decide to break someone's already fragile trust, you might want to consider where you stand in this whole thing.

These days, I have found that no matter how you try to talk sense into someone or help them find their way back to something, if they don't meet you halfway....there's no use in doing so. I apparently have wasted half my life covering a good for nothing's back and having her have my back wasn't the smartest choice either. I walked out of this relationship with a dozen cleavers stuck on my back. And yes, it hurts.

So the next time you wonder why I no longer am able to look at you in the eyes or if I turn away, it's probably because you have inflicted the highest multitude of pain anyone has ever inflicted unto me. I am a good friend but I am the worst enemy you could ever ask for. Good riddance.